"Nirvana Chai"

A white Honda city was swiftly cruising across the highway, almost silently, like a shooting star zooming across deep new moon night.  Dark silhouettes of random objects wrapped in thick winter fog were racing past the side windows.  Both the headlights were struggling to cut the dense fog and show the way ahead. The Eagles were singing ‘Long road out of Eden’ in a low voice helping Vinod enjoy the early morning drive. The atmosphere inside the car was warm and Gowri, Suresh, and Akhila started dozing as soon as they got in to the car.

The roads were empty by courtesy of a deadly winter morning, and despite fog Vinod was managing good speed. Vinod enjoys driving, alone more likely; however the current situation was not bad either, with other three dozing. He started humming along with Eagles and smoothly changed gears to overtake a Volvo. ‘Life can’t be anymore smooth he thought’ and felt very glad that the 3-day vacation kicked off at 130 kmph. ‘How more to come?’ he felt excited, but could not quantify that ‘how much’ any further.

Vacations are pretty rare for him and Gowri. Both of them work at big corporates at middle management level and very frequently burn their mind, body and soul during their weekdays. It’s all about power points, performance measures, pressing timelines, peer politics, and pointless infinite discussions. This 3-day break had been more than welcoming for them – Vinod felt that all his favorable stars, for once, have aligned in his favor.

More than for him, he felt good for Gowri – she is too much work oriented and is a perfectionist. At least he would get small leisure breaks with Suresh, but Gowri on the other hand is just work. Vinod looked at Gowri. She was in deep sleep unmindful of the posture-restricting seat and occasional bright lights from the headlights of heavy cargo carrying traffic. There was a faint smile which always amused Vinod ‘how can she sleep so peacefully? Nothing in this world can wipe that off her face’ he concluded after noticing that day after day after day from past 5 years. He did not realize Akhila watching him closely from behind.

“Need company Vinod?” It was Akhila from rear seat right behind him. The question came up suddenly for Vinod amidst all Eagles, fog, headlights, and he could not reply back immediately. “Vinod? Sleepy?” Akhila asked with a little concern this time and added “I can drive if you want.” She knows that like Suresh and Gowri, even Vinod had late working night yesterday. “No Akhila, am fine” Vinod said, paused for a moment, and said again with a smile “I thought you slept but.”

“I dozed for few moments, but now am fine. I don’t work till late hours like you three do, you see” Akhila said with a teasing twinkle in her eyes, “how far have we come?” Vinod smiled at first part of her sentence about working later hours. He has an appreciation for Akhila for she being very much independent, she just started her own charted accounting company – for now she is the only employee and rather employer too. She could never relate to working under someone. There is some flair in her, which appeals to Vinod. He said, “We made good speed Akhila, covered almost 150 kilometers in last 90 minutes, so we almost 1/3^rd through our journey.” “Wow!! That’s fast!!” Akhila’s eyes widened with excitement “do you want to stop for tea or small break?” “Yeah, I guess so, let me check for a dhaba, let’s not wake up these two, but” Vinod said and started looking around.

After 15 minutes of smooth drive with random low voice discussions, Vinod parked car in front of what looked like small Chai stall and said, “Well, finally here it is ‘The Chai’, country side.” Both Vinod and Akhila came out of the car, and suddenly realized how cold it was. While walking towards the chai place, Vinod tried to avoid stepping on dew drops hanging from tender grass blades grown just by the side of the highway. “There could be millions of those” Akhila said playfully. Vinod smiled back, “Can you check if Suresh or Gowri are awake, they could have some hot tea too?” “Sure”, Akhila turned back towards the car.

Vinod closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Though the air was cold, there was more freshness in it. He stayed there and watched a couple of heavy trucks pass by. Whenever a truck with heavy headlights passed by, the moisture in the air reflected that light causing some peculiar flashes; he waited and watched a few more trucks pass by. Finally, after being completely filled with the view and dew, Vinod walked towards the small wooden shop-like place. It was made of thin metal sheets covering all four directions and above with the support of 4 wet wooden logs. Posters of random movies were stuck on the metal sheets. In between the margin of the highways and the shop, which was a few feet away, there was a huge hoarding of local political leader wishing everyone a happy festival season. The poster was terribly soaked and showed signs of peeling off. At the entrance of the shop was a small fire place, around which an elderly person was making tea.  The man appeared to be in his late 70s. He greeted Vinod in a shivering voice “Salaam sahib, kya lenge?” Vinod looked back to see if Akhila returned. She was at car speaking something, and he could make out that all three would be joining. He turned back to elder man and said, “Four tea” showing his 4 fingers of his right hand. The elder person nodded and made a gesture to Vinod to sit of any horizontal planks and yelled mildly looking at the rear part of stall “Are you bringing the cups or not?”

Out of nowhere an elderly woman came out holding a huge utensil having lot of cups and saucers. She put them down near the fire place, and looked at the old man face sharply. The old man immediately looked down avoiding her gaze and got busy making tea. She looked at Vinod, and spoke as though she knew him from very long time and sat next to him saying, “Son, this fellow is always in hurry, I don’t understand why?” Vinod felt a surge of affection as old woman sat next to him. He looked at her face, she looks younger compared to him, but still old; ‘she should around 65 years old’ Vinod thought. Old man mumbled within himself after hearing the remark, but dint say anything back. “Tea powder is almost empty” Old man said as though trying to change the conversation, but not looking at old woman. ‘Hmmm,” she let out a long sigh, “how many more teas do this serve?”  He replied back still not looking her “20 more, probably” Vinod watched both of them closely. He felt there is something about them definitely more than what meets the eye.

“Your tea ready saab,” Old man put all 4 tea cups in plate came walking towards Vinod and looked around, “are you alone?” Vinod turned back towards car and saw all three coming, “No. Keep them here” he said with a gesture, and looking back at the old man, he asked “so, what are you going to do for tea powder after 20 cups of tea?” Old man bended down to put tea cups on wooden plank stopped midway with a sudden surprise which in few moments turned in to deeper surprise; he looked straight in to Vinod’s eyes. He did not say anything, put the tea cups on the bench and turned back. “Nothing much Son, I will make him run to market and get him bring more tea powder” the old woman who was watching all this said jovially. Vinod turned towards her and wanted to say something as he did not find her answer complete. Old woman also could make out that Vinod was not convinced with her answer and realized that this person has not put that question across just as a random topic to cut time. She tried to ease the ‘unconvincing part’ with a smile “arre don’t worry son, this drama happens once in every 2 days.” Vinod, though still unconvinced with the reply, liked old woman’s smile. It was beautiful, and its beauty was coming from confidence generated from unknown source. Vinod smiled back at her too and winked at her, “but can he run at this age?” Old woman laughed and before she could say anything the old man interrupted them with mild irritation “Of course I can run, it’s a habit you know, I’ve been running all my life.” Old woman laughed even louder, but Vinod could not join that and silently took a sip. He felt warm from inside; the tea was very tasty and comforting. Vinod asked, “So, how long have you been here?” Old man responded still holding on to that irritation, “since before you were born,” he paused a moment and asked, “How old are you?”  Vinod replied, “30.” Old man shook his head as though he was expecting that answer said “perhaps even before your mom and dad were born.” ‘Can’t argue there’ Vinod took another comforting sip and asked another question in a jovial mood, “Am sure you did not have this Chai stall from before my mom was born?”

The old couple suddenly went quiet; the small chai stall went cold in a moment. Vinod apologetically said, “Did I ask something wrong? I am sorry.”  Vinod felt guilty that he was probing their misery, but he was also genuinely curious to know more about them. He did not understand how not ask further, but still learn the story this couple.  After a moment of silence, he asked again cautiously this time, “Did I ask something wrong?” Old woman came out of cold first, she said “No, nothing wrong son in your question, son. At this age we really don’t know what is right and what is wrong.” She put up a ‘nirvana’ smile. It was this smile that hooked on to Vinod again. There are some evident problems this couple is facing, which he does not know yet, but obvious. And still this ‘smile’ pops up on old woman’s face often. ‘From where is the strength behind this smile coming from’ Vinod wondered and looked in to her eyes as though asking her to tell more.

“We lived here from the time we remember living. Both of us belong to this same village. Born here and this land is still taking care of us. I guess we will be buried in this land, as well.” She paused and continued, “And yeah, we had good money back then, and we owned a decent amount of land too.” Vinod nodded as though he expected that. This couple did not seem like they’ve been like this all their lives. They seemed to have lived well. He wanted to ask ‘what happened to all that money/land? Why this poverty now?’ but kept it for later as old woman seemed to continue. “World is changing so fast, we don’t think we belong here anymore; we cannot relate with anything” Old woman ended the topic quickly letting out a deep breath of warm air. Thin layer of moisture in her eyes painfully reflected dim light as truck passed by.

How would it be if world you lived in for 70 years, kept changing and changing and finally to an extent that you don’t relate to it anymore? It is not the landscapes that define a place; it’s the people who live there. It’s a race whoever adapts early survives. And in this race, ‘The Hearty’ always falls behind.  Somehow Vinod could already relate to what the old woman meant. He is just 30 and still there are aspects where he feels totally unrelated. Around 10 years back he could remember he would hang around with a group of friends in canteen have a lot of gossip and laugh aloud. But now, people seem to looking more in to their tablets than people around. And even in his friends who once sat with him in canteen, he could see few hook to tablets and others who feel lonely. Vinod felt emotional and asked in a very sincere tone “what happened to all that land now?” Old man pitched in and replied wryly, “your car is parked on it right now.”

Vinod was shocked momentarily. He did not know what to reply back. Their story was pretty evident; all their land was acquired by government to construct this 8-lane national highway. He was surprised to an extent as the highway was built almost 8 – 10 years back. It’s a long time since their land was taken and most certainly long time since the ‘big’ money for acquisition would have been paid as well. It’s pretty evident that the money definitely has not reached them. Also, Vinod got the hint that the old man made uncountable trips around government offices following up for money.  Vinod still asked, “Did you not get the compensation amount?” Old woman smiled back, “pretty evident isn’t it?” She continued, “The rules of game changed, this is not even our world, and we cannot fight it here anymore.”

Old man was growing more and more restless with every probing question Vinod is asking. He thought that the irony they are living every day is for Vinod, just a tea-time topic, ‘these younger generations can never understand or relate’ he mumbled. Old woman was at ease, she dint mind Vinod’s question as for her, whether Vinod is asking for time pass or genuinely concerned, did not seem to matter. “The money we once had was consumed overtime, we were farmers and been at mercy of ‘The Rain God’ all our lives” Old woman paused briefly and looked up at the local politicians hoarding and said, “Now, for the compensation money, we are at his mercy now.”  Vinod nodded his head in understanding. He inquired about the amount of land they had, and made quick calculations with numbers from 7-8 years back and concluded that the money they should have got should have been close to 40 lakhs. It’s a big amount and could keep this old couple really comfortable till their last day. Vinod’s emotion deepened. Old man pitched with helplessness, “looks like we are not the only ones waiting for our death, which of course we pray to come soon.” Vinod did not question anymore and looked at old woman. She was looking up, above to hoarding in to the vast skies, blankly. Her eyes were still and moisture earlier seen is no there anymore, as though the last few drops of tears left for this life have dried out. She said blankly, “I have only one last wish, that both of us die together.”

What was yours been for so long has been taken way and yet nothing can be done.  You cannot fight.  No one around is familiar to even talk to or share with; you only live because you are not dead yet. Sometimes just living itself is such a burden. It’s strange how life treats you that the thought of death is very comforting. The last 10 -15 years of their life had been a war. It’s unfair that it came so late in their life and took away everything from them, including hope. Though nothing to fight for, and yet they are fighting. Fighting to survive each and every day till death arrives – with a smile; a smile which is complete and nothing to lose anymore.

“Your tea went cold, you dint even drink a sip” Old woman broke the coldness with her warm smile. Vinod came back around. He looked towards car to see the status of remaining three. “Look here, Sir!!” It was Suresh’s voice. There was some excitement in it as always. “When did you guys come here?” Vinod asked. Suresh said playfully, “we were here from the time we parked our car on their land.” Old man and woman giggled at Suresh’s remarks and rest four of them joined them in some pleasant laughter bringing some warmth in to the chai stall.